lifting the darkness

Well, clearly, I haven't been all that good at knowing just how to lift a dark smothering kind of depression. I find myself drowning again, and wonder if perhaps I start keeping a blog for medicinal purposes, for release and for processing all this stuff, I might actually break on through.

It's late here, and I am tired. After tossing and turning for an hour or so, I have removed myself from bed to sit and write. I was going to draw, but couldn't muster the inspiration to come up with an idea.

I just did a google search using this search term.

Please make me laugh

I am in a new and strange place, having recently moved from the extreme East of my country to the extreme West. The little bit of relief that I found in my old home was the oceans, which was just a minutes walk away.

I am about sixteen kilometres from the water here, and do not have a car... so my strolls by Mumma Ocean are no more part of my daily life. I am lost here!

I have no friends here, and have just had quite an ugly falling out with one of my closest friends from home. She was my lifeline, and she has lost the plot. She is gone from my life.

I guess in time I will settle in here. I will find my feet and find new friends... I have always been pretty adaptable.

But I am feeling like a fish out of water right now.

This blog is my little luxury. The freedom to say all this, knowing that perhaps someone out there might read. The freedom to say all this, even if no one does read it. I just need to get this off my chest. Maybe I will become a little lighter and things get a little better, and I could muster up the inspiration necessary to write some poetry.

I hope, for myself, and any random readers, that the release happening right now might be just the medicine I need. And that the entries in this blog become a little brighter.

Peace.